Had a quick catch up with Lin today.
I kinda miss the lass back in KL.
So our conversation today started with her feedback on my K-drama recommendation.
“Chocolate” on Netflix. It’s not the typical lovely-dovey K-drama.
That drama is full of heavy emotions; a diversion if you needed a break from the “cliche” drama galore.
Having said that I kinda felt guilty when she told me that she cried at every episode. On a happier note, she loves the whole series. That’s definitely a bonus.
We talked about Covid-19 and our current political situation.
An update here and there about life but something touched my heart when she said this to me
Yakin babe.. semua ni ada hikmah.. lg byk ujian u.. besar lg ganjaran allah nak bagi.. just sabar
Looking back, my entire life had been nothing but chaos.
I’ve hit the rock bottom and trust me I’m still somewhere down there trying to crawl my way out.
Some may have said that they wish they have my life. I can’t help it but smile because the life that they saw is just a small portion that I let people see.
“There’s a hikmah” they said.
If I’m allowed to be honest, there are loads of times when “life happened” I was not able to see any hikmah out of it.
But I remember saying this to god instead, “Take me to the 60th day”. Not sure why 60 in particular, I guess by then I’ll get better. Some days I’m hopeful but most of the day I was impatient. I want day 60 to be here the soonest. True enough, come the 60th day even though everything seems so fresh at the back of my head but I felt way better.
I then realize that was my way of coping with life.
So whenever my friends are facing any difficult situation I couldn’t bring myself to tell them to be patient. It’s a lonely place to be; having flooded with unpleasant thoughts but you are not able to articulate your feelings into words so that people would be able to listen to you. All I wanted to do is to listen to them and whenever they are done I want to extend my arms and hug them. That’s the very least I could do.
As for now, I’ll try to be more present. Learning to be in the moment for whatever it may be.