I’ve been celebrating Eid without a complete family member(s) since 19 years ago.
Started with Kak Ngah being away in the Emerald Isle,
Then Papa passed away followed by Mama.
I’ve celebrated Eid over Skype for that’s the only medium we could utilize to see each other. Everyone especially Papa & Mama was so excited they could see their daughter and grandson through the screen though they are far away.
I’ve celebrated Eid on my own in the empty house.
Flew thousands of miles away to the foreign land that doesn’t celebrate Eid just so that I could be with Kak Ngah & kids on the first day of Syawal. I can still remember being the only local boarding the aircraft and that confused look on the ground staff’s face, he asked “Aik, Orang balik Raya, Cik nak pergi mana?”. I could only smile cuz I’d burst in tears if I were to say “I have no one here.”
And also, I am blessed to have “friends that turn into a family”. I was invited to celebrate Eid together with them and their loved ones.
Every year since Mama passed away, I don’t really look forward to celebrating Hari Raya cuz it ain’t the same anymore. Nothing could beat the feeling when you have your parents and your siblings gathered on this special day.
It gets lonely and nothing could fill up the void in me.
This year was different, I was scheduled to fly back weeks before Ramadan. I’ve mentally prepared myself to have another round of solo fasting month and quiet Eid back in KL. Little that I know things were written differently for me. Another Ramadan and Hari Raya with Kak Ngah and kiddos are in the book.
Through the chaos and uncertainty, I was gifted with this. Extended time on the holy month to be with family. It’ll never be complete but it’s enough cuz this kind of opportunity doesn’t come often.
The “new norm” of celebrating Eid ain’t new to me, it’s hard to adapt. I know. From my first-hand experience over the past 19 years, I’m still struggling. On the brighter side soon after this chaos is over you could’ve still hug your parents, meet up with the families and the list goes on. So chin’s up, this is only temporary.
While it’ll still be the same for me.
Sending love all the way from the Land of Leprechaun to wherever you are in this globe.
Selamat Hari Raya.
Maaf Zahir & Batin
♥️
Amy H.